How We Can Self-Regulate When Our Kids Trigger Us

self-care Jan 17, 2023

As a parent, it can be incredibly frustrating and overwhelming when your child exhibits challenging behavior. It's natural to feel triggered and react in a way that may not be helpful. However, parents need to recognize and manage their own emotions to handle the situation and support their child effectively. Here are some ways you can self-regulate when you are triggered. 

  1. Take a deep breath. When our children's behavior triggers us, it is easy to react impulsively. Instead, try taking a deep breath and counting to ten before responding. This will give you a moment to pause and consider your response.
  2. Identify the trigger. When you are feeling triggered, take a moment to identify what specifically is causing your reaction. Is it your child's tone of voice, a specific behavior, or an experience that is being triggered? Understanding the root cause of your reaction can help you address it more effectively.
  3. Practice self-care. As parents, we often put ourselves last on the list of priorities. However, practicing self-care is essential for being able to regulate our emotions and respond to our children in a calm and composed manner. This can include exercise, meditation, or simply taking a few minutes to yourself daily.
  4. Communicate with your child. When we feel triggered, it is easy to lash out at our children without taking the time to understand their perspective. Instead, try to communicate with your child and understand what they are feeling and what they need. This will help to diffuse the situation and build a stronger relationship.
  5. Seek support. Raising children can be challenging and it is important to seek support when needed. This can be from friends, family, or a therapist. Talking through your feelings and receiving guidance and support can help you navigate difficult situations with your children.

Parenting can be challenging, but by practicing self-regulation, we can respond to our children calmly and composedly. Remember to take a deep breath, identify the trigger, practice self-care, communicate with your child, and seek support when needed. With these strategies, you can easily navigate the ups and downs of parenting and build a stronger relationship with your children.